Each of us has something that makes us shudder. Something that we take great effort to avoid. Do you know what that is for you? I'm not talking about spiders or snakes. Nor anything physical for that matter. I am referring to difficult things we need to embrace to further our growth and abundance. For some people it could be change (Numerology defines this as issues of Freedom and Discipline). For others it could be perfectionism (Numerology defines this as Vision and Acceptance). The thing for me is: vulnerability (Issues of Trust and Openness). This realization came to me after I was told that my heart chakra required some strengthening. Specifically, it needed to be more compassionate.
So what does vulnerability have to do with sympathy for the suffering of others? What is the connection? In order to trust others, we need to trust ourselves. We need to open our heart and take emotional risks. And get this; we need to share feelings. Yikes! When you share your own suffering, others are able to share theirs. You begin to see that we are all going through many of the same things, thus creating compassion.
Numerology has taken me far in creating compassion but its birth place was during some self-actualizing exercise to strengthen my heart chakra. I had come across that word vulnerability. It had created such a burdensome physical response that I needed to give it some attention. As I began to write down my feelings it flowed somewhat naturally into a poem.
This is dedicated to my sister Bev, for she now knows how this is important.
V u l n e r a b i l i t y
This word makes me quiver
This word makes me quake
Scary, scary, scary
The same as an earthquake
To avoid this seems imperative
To avoid this is my chief desire
Disturbing, disturbing, disturbing
Akin to setting yourself on fire
I keep busy to allude it
I keep busy to dupe its fate
Creepy, creepy, creepy
Resembling the opening of Hells Gate
It is a situation that I do not embrace
It is a situation that my attention I do not intend
Awful, awful, awful
Identical to the death of a dear friend
It keeps at me in relationships that are eventually evaded
It keeps at me in council and in verse
Atrocious, atrocious, atrocious
Like an evil curse
The need to deal with it resonates in my body
The need to deal with it is crystal clear
Painful, painful, painful
Comparable to manifesting my worst fear
And so, I bravely ask for help and soon after, ask for faith
And so, I begin to comprehend
“We are here! We are here! We are here!
I now follow the guidance my angels send
I am not afraid of it anymore
No more pain, no more evading, no more dread
“You are safe! You are safe! You are safe!"
Victory is in my head
I dare you to be vulnerable. I double-dog dare you!
All my love and light,