Dan Millman Goes Hurling Across My Bedroom...#ThrowBackThursday

#Throw Back Thursday

Do you recognize your life path? Do you know your truth? Or are you like Goldilocks…
…..your waistline too big?
…..your love life too cold?
…..your job too hard?
Or perhaps you’re one of the three bears and some stranger has been eating your porridge, sitting in your chair and sleeping in your bed.

You are not alone.

In 2011 I was suffering from stress related health issues. I was directed to Phuong Nguyen, a Kinesiologist in Durango, CO. We had a wonderful session in which I balled my eyes out and got some well needed focus. She referred me to Dan Millman’s book The Life You Were Born To Live.  I headed directly to the book store from the appointment. It spoke to me at the start; “A guide to finding your life purpose”. Yes, I need a guide, desperately. I love a good self-help book and for only twenty five dollars I could easily afford it.

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I rushed home and eagerly read the first eight pages, skipping to page 123 once I determined my “birth number”. Filled with enthusiasm I began to read, “here to work through issues of creativity while learning to trust the wise and beautiful spirit in themselves and others.”  Yes! I am creative. Yes! I do need to learn to trust. Yes! I want to be a wise and beautiful spirit. Wow, this Millman guy really knows what he is talking about. I continue reading, “…most seek knowledge outside of themselves rather than trust their intuitive depths.” I am a seeker of knowledge, but intuitive? No. I read on “..deep down, are wise and healing spirits; they can express themselves like angels in human form once they align themselves with the higher energy and will that manifest within them.”
What a bunch of crap!
Me, intuitive? No!
Me, a healer? Most definitely not!

I hurl the book (the force was great, I’m a softball player not an angel) across my bedroom. I would have returned it to the book store except I damaged the cover when it hit the door frame.

This information broke my heart. I wanted to trust that book. I needed so badly to find my life’s purpose. Not knowing was making me sick. The book was going to bring great epiphanies for me. Trumpets were going to sound. Passion was going to flow. An ease in knowing who I am was going to wash over me.

And mostly....mostly…everything was going to be just right.

The book sat quietly collecting dust and cat hair. I couldn’t let $25 go to waste so I investigated friends and families birth numbers. The readings clicked with everything I knew about them.

In the ancient Scottish tale the three bears devour the trespasser. Over time, small variations are made to the story and it becomes a popular children’s story. Largely in part to the change in the ending where Goldilocks jumps out the window and her outcome is left to our imagination.

Your outcome, my outcome, is left solely to our imagination. Armed with that knowledge and a little self-examination we can become so much more. Those words from Dan Millman still seem miles away. Yet, I know they are true. They are my truth:

“here to work through issues of creativity while learning to trust the wise and beautiful spirit in themselves and others.” 

Please follow me here as I learn to trust and become the healer I am meant to be.

Love and Light,
Tricia

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Dan Millman Goes Hurling Across My Bedroom

#Throw Back Thursday

Do you recognize your life path? Do you know your truth? Or are you like Goldilocks…
…..your waistline too big?
…..your love life too cold?
…..your job too hard?
Or perhaps you’re one of the three bears and some stranger has been eating your porridge, sitting in your chair and sleeping in your bed.

You are not alone.

In 2011 I was suffering from stress related health issues. I was directed to Phuong Nguyen, a Kinesiologist in Durango, CO. We had a wonderful session in which I balled my eyes out and got some well needed focus. She referred me to Dan Millman’s book The Life You Were Born To Live.  I headed directly to the book store from the appointment. It spoke to me at the start; “A guide to finding your life purpose”. Yes, I need a guide, desperately. I love a good self-help book and for only twenty five dollars I could easily afford it.

Super Power Tricia Gunberg.JPG

I rushed home and eagerly read the first eight pages, skipping to page 123 once I determined my “birth number”. Filled with enthusiasm I began to read, “here to work through issues of creativity while learning to trust the wise and beautiful spirit in themselves and others.”  Yes! I am creative. Yes! I do need to learn to trust. Yes! I want to be a wise and beautiful spirit. Wow, this Millman guy really knows what he is talking about. I continue reading, “…most seek knowledge outside of themselves rather than trust their intuitive depths.” I am a seeker of knowledge, but intuitive? No. I read on “..deep down, are wise and healing spirits; they can express themselves like angels in human form once they align themselves with the higher energy and will that manifest within them.”
What a bunch of crap!
Me, intuitive? No!
Me, a healer? Most definitely not!

I hurl the book (the force was great, I’m a softball player not an angel) across my bedroom. I would have returned it to the book store except I damaged the cover when it hit the door frame.

This information broke my heart. I wanted to trust that book. I needed so badly to find my life’s purpose. Not knowing was making me sick. The book was going to bring great epiphanies for me. Trumpets were going to sound. Passion was going to flow. An ease in knowing who I am was going to wash over me.

And mostly....mostly…everything was going to be just right.

The book sat quietly collecting dust and cat hair. I couldn’t let $25 go to waste so I investigated friends and families birth numbers. The readings clicked with everything I knew about them.

In the ancient Scottish tale the three bears devour the trespasser. Over time, small variations are made to the story and it becomes a popular children’s story. Largely in part to the change in the ending where Goldilocks jumps out the window and her outcome is left to our imagination.

Your outcome, my outcome, is left solely to our imagination. Armed with that knowledge and a little self-examination we can become so much more. Those words from Dan Millman still seem miles away. Yet, I know they are true. They are my truth:

“here to work through issues of creativity while learning to trust the wise and beautiful spirit in themselves and others.” 

Please follow me here as I learn to trust and become the healer I am meant to be.

Love and Light,
Tricia

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Big Wishes and Success....are you blocking these?

Are you afraid to wish your big wishes?

It could be sabotaging your success.

 

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Prior to September 30,2017 my definition of success was purely career oriented. All my career achievements would make everything else happen. Even after years of studying Abraham Hicks and Law of Attraction this mindset persisted! While attending Stephanie Beebe’s workshop Saturday, a new word was added to my definition of success. That new word has also taken on new meaning.

Lead by Stephanie in a visualization exercise, I saw visions of things I’ve never seen before. I was holding hands with people I didn’t think possible, having fun experiences with loved ones, and feeling so much love it was almost overwhelming.  

The experience shook me. How will I add this new word,  which felt to me like “family”, to my success goals? And, why hadn’t many of my success goals in the past not come to fruition?  

Maybe, I thought, I haven’t been ‘successful’ as I want to be because I don’t know what the true definition of success is for me.

Okay, this is a bitter pill to swallow, but why is this happening?

Uggghhh! Then it hit me:

 I have not allowed myself to want things. I have not allowed myself to wish big wishes! My limited beliefs have blocked me (This is Stephanie’s magik*! She can reveal to you how you do this to yourself.) from wishing them by keeping them from my awareness.

It used to bug me when Abraham Hicks asked, “Are you enjoying your wanting?” I thought I had been working on this! Ha…getting ready to be ready, still! AND, getting to know myself better continues. I know exactly what life event caused this block, but this doesn’t do me any good. Blame gets me nowhere.

The messages I give others are for me just as much for them, both in 1:1’s and in my posts, so I take a few moments and I review them in my mind. Low and behold- The same approach I have been suggesting for EVERYONE else is the same answer here: You need to know yourself, then say “yes” to it.

Here is a refresher both for you and I. The path to self-actualization is an important one, a spiritual one and one I hope you’ll continue to take with me.

How do I get to know myself better?

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#1 Explore self-actualization tools and workshops.
Don’t limit these. Keep trying new ones even when you find ones you like. Some of my favorite: Numerology, Astrology, Intuitive Readings/Coaching, Reiki, Yoga. Oh, yes, workshops with Stephanie and my book.
 

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#2 Spend time with yourself in Quiet and in Happiness.
Meditation is great but experience other ways too: golf by yourself, going fishing, or walking (no phone!). Make room and create awareness to increase the amount of time you are happy. Eliminate things that make you sad, angry or frustrated. (News, Social Media, People, Places, Activities)

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#3 Observe your emotions.
Pay special attention to those that make you uncomfortable or you prefer not to have.  Honor them, make changes ( emotions are like gears in a car post)

 

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#4 New Experiences!
Do something today that makes you nervous. It is important that you stretch yourself and shed light on yourself and get you out of your comfort zone.

I will be working on this for myself, doing my visualization exercise that Stephanie suggested and being more open to my wantings. The journey continues as we continue to learn how to Say YES to who you are to create MAGIK! I loved to hear from you, either here, via IM or on my Facebook page.

Love and Light,
Tricia

 

*Magik- a technique for brining desired changes into physical manifestation. A process of crafting and shaping one’s life. Not to be confused with magic which involves cleaver illusions.  

 

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Free Winter Solstice Reading (December 21, 2014)

The shortest day of the year, reminds me of the quote from Thomas Fuller, “It is always the darkest before the dawn.” (Scientifically this is not true. It is darkest at 180 degrees.) For the Solstice, the darkest day gives way to increasingly more light. As a metaphor, it offers encouragement to those who experience darkness in their lives. For some this encouragement (light) is God, therapy, sobriety, truth or another choice that brings them out. 

With this in mind I pulled cards.

Past: You refused to take any responsibility for a bad situation. You believe all the negative criticism you have heard in your life, from yourself or others.  NOTE: this is the darkness

Present: Cut the crap! Stop denying any truth. Confront inaccuracies. Note: this is the light coming in.

Future: Victory. The chance to put it all together and create something special is upon you. Note: This is the dawn, using your truth for a brighter day.

 Summary: When you find yourself in a situation
you do not like, explore it by asking yourself questions about it. Try as hard as you can to
be honest with yourself about it. When you are
able to get to the core, it will not have the same effect as it did initially and chances are you will
feel victorious.

 If you’d like to know how I worked with it please read on.

My thoughts:

Past: Well! Excuse me! It wasn’t my fault that many people in my life have been crazy critical!  Combining some *Ho'oponopono and tapping techniques I have learned I explored my reaction by asking myself questions like: “Am I responsible for this?”  and “Is this true?" The conclusion I came to was that other people’s behavior had nothing to do with me. I just needed to chill out, do the best I could and not worry. Why couldn’t I do this in the past? Blaming people didn’t do me any good, no matter how justified.

And, crud! Why do I criticize myself so much? Why do I replay the criticism from others? My anger at others was just anger at myself. “Stop saying all those mean things! It won’t help to beat me down!” As a teacher I dealt with the old name calling daily: “so-n-so called me do-do head”. It was at about the 1000th time hearing my response that it dawned on me that I was talking to myself. “Is that true? Are you a do-do head?” They would always say very confidently, “No, I am not.”

Present: Truth? The truth is I am an intelligent, creative, contentious person. Most of the criticizing I received in the past was not true but I allowed it to effect me down to the core. Current truth exploration is helping me discover things that make my heart sing. This leaves less room for criticism.

Future: Now that I have decided to apply truth to situations that cause friction and take responsibility for everything that goes on in my life, I have found greater success in alleviating it. This combined with a better understanding of who I am is leading to victory.   

Love, Light and the strength to see it,

Tricia

*More on this to come.

Are you trying to avoid anything?

Each of us has something that makes us shudder. Something that we take great effort to avoid. Do you know what that is for you? I'm not talking about spiders or snakes. Nor anything physical for that matter. I am referring to difficult things we need to embrace to further our growth and abundance. For some people it could be change (Numerology defines this as issues of Freedom and Discipline). For others it could be perfectionism (Numerology defines this as Vision and Acceptance). The thing for me is: vulnerability (Issues of Trust and Openness). This realization came to me after I was told that my heart chakra required some strengthening. Specifically, it needed to be more compassionate. 

So what does vulnerability have to do with sympathy for the suffering of others? What is the connection? In order to trust others, we need to trust ourselves. We need to open our heart and take emotional risks. And get this; we need to share feelings. Yikes! When you share your own suffering, others are able to share theirs. You begin to see that we are all going through many of the same things, thus creating compassion.

Numerology has taken me far in creating compassion but its birth place was during some self-actualizing exercise to strengthen my heart chakra. I had come across that word vulnerability. It had created such a burdensome physical response that I needed to give it some attention. As I began to write down my feelings it flowed somewhat naturally into a poem.

 This is dedicated to my sister Bev, for she now knows how this is important.

 

V  u  l  n  e  r  a  b  i  l  i  t  y

This word makes me quiver
This word makes me quake
Scary, scary, scary
The same as an earthquake

To avoid this seems imperative
To avoid this is my chief desire
Disturbing, disturbing, disturbing
Akin to setting yourself on fire

I keep busy to allude it
I keep busy to dupe its fate
Creepy, creepy, creepy
Resembling the opening of Hells Gate

It is a situation that I do not embrace
It is a situation that my attention I do not intend
Awful, awful, awful
Identical to the death of a dear friend

It keeps at me in relationships that are eventually evaded
It keeps at me in council and in verse
Atrocious, atrocious, atrocious
Like an evil curse

The need to deal with it resonates in my body
The need to deal with it is crystal clear
Painful, painful, painful
Comparable to manifesting my worst fear

And so, I bravely ask for help and soon after, ask for faith
And so, I begin to comprehend
“We are here! We are here! We are here!
I now follow the guidance my angels send

I am not afraid of it anymore
No more pain, no more evading, no more dread
“You are safe! You are safe! You are safe!"
Victory is in my head

 

I dare you to be vulnerable. I double-dog dare you!

All my love and light,

Tricia